I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize