yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
