Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
