oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
