9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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