dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.