Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
