i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize