i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
