I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
