New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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