He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
