She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
