And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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