Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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