At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
