it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
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Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
You dont lie about slip and slides
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
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It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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