We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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