IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I FOUND THE LEGS
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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