Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
