White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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