1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize