Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
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Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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