do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
