Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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