I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
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