"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
