I heard we made out
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
