our cab driver is having phone sex.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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