problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I'm always down for nudity.
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