Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
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