So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
