How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
