I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I don't deserve a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize