If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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