How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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