Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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