if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
