Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
