Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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