take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
