I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
