Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(212): View more from New York

plz talk dirty to me

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.

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(214): View more from Texas

Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.

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(316): View more from Kansas

No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

bloody. ill be home soon.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.

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(310): View more from California

I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.

(724): View more from Pennsylvania

What about the best friend?

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