i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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