scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
We are all done wearing pants today
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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