So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
