gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
My ass is underappreciated
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
