someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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