one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
