dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
MIDGETS
????
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
